Paul Healy’s Week



Real-life drama

This evening we caught up with ‘Murdaugh Murders: A Southern Scandal’ on Netflix. I had it on my ‘To watch’ list since March of this year when lawyer Alex Murdaugh was found guilty of the murder of his wife and son.

The three-part crime series tells the true story of the shocking downfall of a distinguished legal family in South Carolina. Alex Murdaugh, until recently a successful lawyer, is now a convicted double murderer. The deaths of three other people are also central to this grim saga. Were there more murders? Was the one clearly accidental death covered up?

‘Murdaugh Murders: A Southern Scandal’ is a story of excessive wealth, greed and privilege. It’s the story of an entitled family that spun out of control… as tragedy, murder and addiction ultimately shattered lives and destroyed a once-proud legacy.




Looking ahead…

In a Dublin court today, a barrister said a carer – also a self-styled psychic – told two siblings she had received a message from their dead father, instructing the brother and sister to give her €10k. One of the siblings gave the psychic the €10k in cash. The case has now ended up in court, which the psychic (convicted as we go to press on Wednesday) presumably didn’t foresee…




Eurovision musings

I saw about an hour of tonight’s four-hour Eurovision Song Contest marathon. True to recent years, it was silly, colourful, chaotic, over the top, entertaining, eccentric. Sweden won, pipping the hilarious Finnish entry, ‘Cha Cha Cha’.

The Swedish victory saw them equal Ireland’s record seven Eurovision wins. This completed Ireland’s misery. After our failure to qualify for the final earlier in the week, there was the entirely predictable and unbearable outpouring of self-pity on national radio, with Liveline leading the tedious annual inquest. On Twitter, they were calling for the return of Johnny Logan.

Meanwhile, Liverpool/the BBC ran a brilliant show (all week), with actress Hannah Waddingham achieving overnight ‘national treasure’ status in her role as presenter extraordinaire.




Seeing double

For a long time in today’s Ulster Football final, I couldn’t see a winner, but then again, for a long time in today’s Ulster Football final I could barely see who had possession of the ball. This was due to the bizarre decision to allow the teams line out in kits that were remarkably similar in colour. It was very frustrating for viewers, and must have been a challenge for the referee.

Derry won after a penalty shootout, which is an unsatisfactory way to determine the outcome of a big match. Deciding games on penalties has an element of cruelty about it. Besides, in GAA, penalty shootouts somehow tend to lack the drama we associate with them in soccer. In Gaelic, they fizzle out in an anticlimatic atmosphere, as if we are collectively embarrassed that it has come to this.

As for Dublin, it would appear that reports of their possible demise as a force may have been misguided, this after the rampaging Blues – with 41-year-old Stephen Cluxton back between the posts – claimed a 13th Leinster title in a row, defeating Louth by a 21-point margin. The rest of ‘GAA World’ shifted uneasily in their seats.




Any news?

Ongoing fears that the media might be dumbing down were quashed today when the RTE website proudly announced a big exclusive.

‘Love Island winners indicate that romance is back on’.

The stunning ‘news’ that the winners of the 2021 series of the TV show have rekindled their romance was greeted with high fives and cheers of joy in Roscommon town throughout the day. At last, the agony was over for the public.

Elaborating, the RTE website reported that Liam Reardon and Millie Court have “given their strongest indication yet” that they are back together.

At the entrance to Roscommon Mart, a well-known character whooped with delight as he showed his phone to a slightly startled friend.

“They’re back together!” the farmer gasped. “Look! Read it! THERE! ‘Liam Reardon and Millie Court have given their strongest indication yet that they are back together’”.

The friend said: “Well, it’s their strongest indication yet, it’s not definite…”

As all current affairs/news followers will be aware, Liam and Millie won the ITV show in 2021. The RTE website reports that they were photographed kissing in Barcelona Airport (hence ‘strongest indication yet’).

On what might otherwise have been a slow news day, the story rocked the nation. In Strokestown, there were unconfirmed reports that two Love Island fans had fainted on the (very wide) street. In Ballymoe, an old man said: “Well I never” – which could have meant anything. In Boyle, they were chanting ‘Liam and Millie’ in the post office queue. In the UK, the Tories discussed the alleged reunion in Cabinet, but reports that Michael Fitzmaurice might raise it in the Dáil were seen as mischievous.

Back at Roscommon Mart, the two elderly farmers tried to take it all in. Having discussed the news at length with 14 or 15 other farmers who were coming and going, one of the men suddenly paused.

“It is big news” he mused, “about Liam and Millie. Or is it? Dare I say, maybe we’re being sold a pup; maybe the media is dumbing down, maybe pop culture is blurring the lines as to what actual news is?”

But his friend wasn’t listening, he was immersed in his phone.

“Hey, do you think Philip (Schofield) and Holly (Willoughby) will make it up?”




No deal…

‘Sugi’ from somewhere emails our office to ask if we need any hinges, hooks, harnesses, carabiners or rivets. But I’m not hooked, and actually resent that ‘Sugi’ began his/her email by saying ‘nice day’ – as the email which I read this morning appears to have been sent at 2 am ‘our’ time. It wasn’t a nice day here at that point, and if it was where Sugi is, that has nothing to do with Roscommon. So, sorry Sugi, even without checking our reserves of carabiners, it’s a ‘no’ from me. Then again, maybe the email was generated by AI and maybe I should have gone on a hinge binge.

*If you’re suspicious about an email, do not open any attachment or link.