Congratulations, you’ve got everything sorted, now it’s time to get down to the nitty-gritty of planning the all-important (but argument-inducing) guest list; and I for one don’t envy you. You see, if you’re paying for the big day yourself, then of course you have the monopoly, but the second you put down a deposit with mammy and daddy’s money, then I’m afraid you’ve handed over at least half of your guest list privileges to them, the financial contributors, and that’s gonna generate a headache or three.
However, it doesn’t have to escalate into all-out war, this is meant to be a happy occasion after all, and we believe that with a bit of diplomacy and creativity, as well as round table talks, you can work through your guest list, arriving at a reasonable conclusion that suits everyone. With some tactical (and tactful) planning, research and creativity, you can figure out all of your wedding guest list challenges.
Mind you, we have no solution for your workmate who disgracefully arrives in a floor-length white satin gown accessorised with a tiara; or your in-laws who rock up with their badly-behaved triplet toddlers when they knew you had a ‘no kids’ policy on your big day!
Here’s what we do know…
1. The dream team: Forget about your budget and cut-off point, just for a laugh, make a list of your desired guests; you never know, you may not even hit your limit, and if you do, you can always trim it back according to the ‘must haves.’
2. The A Team: When did you last see them, socialise with them, speak with them on the ‘phone? If it’s been more than a year, and you can’t imagine seeing them for another year, then it’s time to delete.
3. The rellies: If they’re immediate family (and even if you can’t stand them), they must make the cut and receive an invitation.
4. The colleagues: I’m afraid it’s all or nothing here. You cannot invite one or two from your office and ignore the rest. Unless one of your co-workers is your BFF, then you could make an exception. Of course if you’re having a big do, then you should always invite your boss. If it’s a small gathering, as in close family only, you could get away with not inviting the man/woman who pays your wages.
5. The kids: I’m a firm believer in the ‘no kids policy’ at weddings, but that’s me. However if you’re going down that route, do make certain to alert parents by clearly marking all invitations with the names of adults only, and follow that up with a polite ‘phone call or a chat over a coffee in plenty of time to allow them make alternative babysitting arrangements. There should be no ambiguity when it comes to the ‘kids-or-no-kids’ rule, and if you feel an obstinate guest is likely to arrive with the sprogs, buggies, sterilisers, travel cots and car seats in tow, then grow a set and make that (diplomatic) call now!
