The Krakow was 90 with replacement stag!

Walking into Hannon’s Hotel last Friday, I noticed two guys sitting at the bar drinking pints.

  “Are you part of the stag heading to Krakow?” I asked.

  “Yeah, that’s us!”

  The duo were waiting for the rest of the group to arrive and they quickly filled me in on the madness surrounding Brian ‘Eamo’ Larkin’s stag party.

  Athleague man, Brian, owns Centre Point Autos and should have been preparing to fly out to Poland himself. The only problem? Brian wouldn’t be travelling to Krakow with the group as he had fallen down some stairs in the UK recently and cracked some ribs.

  The whole trip was in jeopardy until groomsman Mike Leech stepped forward with a brilliant idea.

  Mike arrived at the bar along with more lads and a banner to mark the event and explained the process of replacing Brian on his own stag: “The whole weekend was going to fall apart so we decided to put an ad for a replacement stag up on DoneDeal.”

  The advertisement called for someone who could be available from Friday to Monday. The potential replacement would only require €100 in order to change the name on the airline ticket. Other requirements included being fit, healthy and the ability to answer to ‘Eamo’, Brian’s nickname (long story).

  Step forward Eamon Melia from Portarlington. The lads were immediately impressed with ‘New Eamo’ and his banter in the ‘WhatsApp’ group chat. Mike continues: “In fairness to Eamon, he rang the number and asked ‘Is this a p**stake?’ He quickly discovered it wasn’t and then he asked ‘Do I have to do an interview?’ He was great craic on the WhatsApp group and he fitted in right away with the lads!”

  ‘Old Eamo’, Brian Larkin, was delighted with his replacement: “Look, I had to make a good situation out of a bad one. I didn’t want anybody losing out. I’ve never met ‘New Eamo’ before in my life. We did an interview on Today FM together and that was the first time I’d really spoken to him.”

  The absent stag was obviously disappointed not to be going, but had the consolation of being well looked after at home after travelling back on the boat from the UK in agony.

  He gushed: “Ah my fiancée Sinéad has been great. We have a little boy, Jamie, who’s five months old so she’s been looking after two babies lately!”

 So, Eamon Melia was named as the late replacement and in doing so has received some royal treatment. Gleeson’s Townhouse put him up for last Sunday night while Hamrock’s Bar in Athleague had a free tab for him to enjoy. Brian Larkin had also offered another incentive: “‘New Eamo’ will be at the wedding. Myself and Sinéad have invited himself and a plus one to the big day in the Landmark Hotel, and sure he can call in and see what stock we have in Centre Point and I’ll look after him with a good deal!”

  Before they boarded their bus to Dublin Airport last Friday, one of the lads told me that the best man was also Missing In Action. “The best man David ‘Crabby’ Crawley is in Australia, but he’ll be home for the wedding on the 3rd of December.”

  And with that they were off, probably the first stag party in history without a stag or best man present!

* The two ‘Eamos’, Brian Larkin and Eamon Melia, are fast becoming national celebrities and will appear on the Ray D’Arcy Show this Saturday night on RTE Television.