Barstool Boyos – 9th of September

Flatley, VAR… and when Liz met Liz

Hey, did you see that egomaniac on the Late Late Show?

YES!

He gets on my nerves sometimes…

Yeah…

All that prancing around, waving his legs and arms…smiling, preening even!

Well, he IS a world class dancer…

Huh?

Michael Flatley?

Oh I meant Ryan Tubridy…

 

(They pause as the Editor issues a stern warning to ease up on Late Late Show criticism and give the new series a chance)

 

Anyway…

Well, anyway, Michael Flatley was on the Late Late to promote his big movie!

Yeah, I know! He’s the star!

Yep!

And the writer…

Yeah!

And the director…

That’s our Michael, alright! What an all-rounder!

Yeah, pity for Michael that he didn’t get to write the reviews too!

 

(They pause to coordinate their near-hourly removal of butterflies from their respective living rooms)

 

What a weekend in the Premier League!

Yeah, some great players in action…

Nah, I’m not talking about players, I’m talking about all the VAR controversy!

Sure! There was lots of drama alright.

Manchester United’s new star scored a nice goal…

Antony?

That’s him! He even managed to get a smile out of Ronaldo!

Ah, our old friend Ronaldo…

THE G.O.A.T.! That means THE GREATEST OF ALL TIME!

Yeah, I know what ‘GOAT’ stands for these days, but I can’t agree!

 

(They pause briefly, before arguing about the merits of Pele, Maradona, Messi, Best, Tony Currie*, Eddie Gray*…)

 

The result is in!

Huh?

It’s Liz! Liz is off to meet Queen Liz!

Oh yeah, well spotted…

Liz Truss is the new UK Prime Minister!

Eh… woo hoo?

Woo WHO is more like it! We hadn’t heard of her until relatively recently!

I know…

Isn’t she hardline on the Northern Ireland protocol?

‘fraid so…

Didn’t Liz ‘go viral’ once when she made a very cheerful speech about British cheese and pork?

Yep, that’s her! And apples, and black pudding!

Do you think any photographer will be cheeky enough to say ‘Say cheese, Liz’?

Love it!

So, where does all this leave Boris?

Well, he’s toast now.

If Boris was a cheese, what type would he be?

I dunno, that’s a very silly question!

Sorry! Anyways, let’s at least wish Liz well…and hope for the best!

Indeed! Hey, I think I know what cheese Boris would compare himself to, if you asked HIM!

Well?

GOAT cheese… ‘cos when it comes to Prime Ministers, he reckons he’s THE G.O.A.T.!

 

*Editor’s prerogative to add in random Leeds legends