Barstool Boyos – 9th of June

Henry, Brian, The Queen and Paddington Bear

TUESDAY

So, were you watching the latest instalment of that mega love-in?

Is it ‘When Henry met Brian’? When they eventually met, that is!

No! Love Island! It was back last night!

Oh I couldn’t watch that rubbish! I much prefer the drama of those intriguing tête-à-têtes between Henry Shefflin and Brian Cody!

But you can’t dismiss Love Island! Half the country is gripped by it already!

Oh I’ve very little time for this reality TV nonsense.

Fair enough! By the way, I thought you might be in our local on Sunday night…

Sorry! I was watching a dancing dog in the final of Britain’s Got Talent!

(They pause to ponder if a world boxing champion has ever scored three points in an inter-county game before, as Lisa O’Rourke did on Sunday)

WEDNESDAY

We’re living in tough times, my friend…

I know! Prices are rising…going through the roof!

A recession on the way?

So they say…

We’ve been through a lot…Covid, the shock of the war, inflation…

People are good. We need to stick together, look out for one another…brighter days will come!

Agreed! And at least we’re off to Croke Park on Saturday! It’s Roscommon v Clare, for a place in the All-Ireland Football quarter-finals!

Can’t wait!

(They pause to compare fuel prices across the county, while playing sombre music in the background)

Hey, what did you think of the Queen’s Platinum Jubilee celebrations?

Eh…is it er…cool…to admit to having watched some of it?

Well according to the Sunday Independent, she’s more popular here than Micheál, or Leo, or Mary Lou!

Did they really ask Mary Lou’s supporters that question?

Now now, don’t be naughty!

I saw the footage of her having tea with that fictional character…

FICTIONAL? Boris is REAL! The PM makes regular visits…

No! The Queen’s sketch with Paddington Bear!

She’s a good sport!

(They pause to discuss favourite cartoon characters of their childhood)

I see Boris survived…

For now…

He’s still top dog…

Just about…

He’ll be back in that chair occupied by Paddington Bear…having afternoon tea with Her Majesty.

As a kid, I was never that keen on Paddington Bear…

You strike me as more of a Scooby Doo type…

Actually, you say Boris is top dog…but when it comes to cartoons, I’m more of a Brian Cody man…

Huh?

TOP CAT!