Barstool Boyos – 4th of May

Shock TV, Belgian Bullet… and GAA draw

Ah sure it was mad stuff altogether…


Pushing. Shoving. Name-calling. Full-scale fights.

Which game were you at?

(Doesn’t listen) It could be brutal at times! I remember one particular brawl which is now legendary…

Meath v Mayo in 1996?

Huh? What are you on about? As I was saying, it was the norm for big eruptions and flare-ups… it was very hard for the man in the middle to control it…

Referees have a difficult job.


The guy in the middle…

I’m on about the regular disputes that broke out…

Yeah, I take it you were at a particularly stormy GAA game at the weekend…

No, I’m talking about the Jerry Springer Show! The great days of talk TV!

Oh I see… TRASH TALK TV! And Jerry was the man in the middle… I get it!

Finally, you get it! Anyways, I was sorry to see that Jerry left us the other day. Called to his eternal reward. What a legend! Meath v Mayo, ya eejit!

Well, I wasn’t sure… Jerry was some boyo, sure enough. Those shows were eye-openers! May the King of ‘Shock TV’ rest in peace.

(They pause to consider watching Jerry Springer clips on YouTube, but decide it’s too early in the day)

So you reckon you’re gonna take up snooker again?

Yes, I’ve been inspired by the new breed of attacking players who made this year’s World Championships so enjoyable!

But wasn’t your highest ever break fairly modest?

I’ll have you know it was a very well constructed 27!

Mmnn… devastating stuff. What a win for Luca Brecel, the new champion! His style is something else!

‘Luca snooka’ they’re calling it! Like I say, I’m now going to pick up the cue again! I think I can emulate his style!

For God’s sake, your highest break was 27!

Yeah, but the Belgian Bullet has inspired me…

You’re more likely to fire blanks!

(They pause to watch the draw for the All-Ireland SFC group stages)

So we’ll be playing Dublin, Sligo and Kildare?

Or Louth, Sligo and Kildare. Actually, it could be Dublin, Galway and Kildare. Or even Louth, Galway and Kildare.

Okay, so that’s pretty clear!

I’ve just realised, whatever about the outcome of the Leinster and Connacht finals, there’s one definite novel pairing… Davy Burke will be trying to take out his native county, Kildare!

Yeah! Forget the Belgian Bullet, hopefully the Burke Bullet is about to fire again!