Barstool Boyos – 4th of March

Mayo, Bielsa, the Rossies, and the tragic events of the week that can’t be ignored…

More humour, he said…

Huh?

The Editor. Wants us to up our game, be more open about our lives…be funnier!

Even funnier?

Yep! Anyways, it’s not exactly a week for humour…

I know, I know…and I think even the Editor would understand that.

(They pause to reflect on the tragedy of the past week)

Why?

Huh?

Why is it necessary…well, it’s certainly not necessary…why does it have to happen?

War?

Yep…and particularly in this case. Putin has no case…

He thinks he has, but nothing can justify this appalling aggression…

Agreed!

They are heroic…

Huh?

The people of Ukraine. Their resistance has been extraordinary, their courage too…

Agreed…

And our hearts go out to the displaced too, to those who have left or are trying to leave their homeland…they are in all our thoughts and prayers.

(They pause to tentatively switch subjects)

So, I believe you finally got back to a GAA game…after lockdown…

Yep!

Your fear of storms miraculously gone…

Mmnn…

So you ventured out?

Yep!

To Newry, obviously…
NO!

Huh?

I went to the Hyde…on Sunday.

Your FIRST big GAA game in months…and it was to see MAYO?

Yeah…well, you could call it a spying mission!

(Editor: There is no suggestion that Roscommon GAA would ever spy on Mayo GAA, or vice versa; as ever, the ‘boyos’ are acting with abandon)

(They pause to enjoy some pancakes and delight in a beautiful March day)

He’s not in great humour himself anyway, a fine one to be telling us to ‘up the humour levels’…

Huh?

The Editor!

What’s wrong with him…are you getting ANYWHERE with our contract talks? Don’t tell me you’ve pushed him too far!

Oh it’s nothing to do with us…that’s not why he’s in bad humour…

Go on…

It’s all because of the crazy guy…he’s gone!

WHO?

He’s left the building! El…

ELVIS?

NO! El Loco! The crazy one! Marcelo Bielsa is gone from Leeds, and the Editor and his deluded Leeds friends are all in mourning!

(They pause to check if any of Bielsa’s trademark ‘bucket seats’ are for sale online…)

So, how were Mayo…in the flesh?

Good! And their supporters took over the town…with some help from the Armagh folks! They were all very welcome!

It was a great occasion for the town, and a welcome boost for businesses…

Indeed!

And Roscommon had a great win in Newry…

I know! Roll on Derry at the Hyde…we’ll be there!

Well, you will be if there’s no storm to scare you off!

(They pause…once again dragged down by the awfulness of events in Ukraine)

The tanks roll.

The shelling ignites the skies…

The flames rise…

The hearts sink.

They are heroic.

Both: They are in our thoughts and prayers.