Barstool Boyos – 3rd of February

I’m guessing you’re a classic middle-aged dad! Listening to Lyric FM yet?

You were a bit funny in the pub last night…

So were you! We had three pints…and you bought the odd round! I couldn’t believe it!

Funny! I meant when you began talking about getting old…

I was just facing facts! We are getting old!

Older…but not old!


(They pause to calculate how much it will cost Enoch Burke in fines if he keeps turning up at his ‘old’ school between now and end of term) 


Do you really think we’re getting old?

We don’t stay out as late as we used to, do we?


Other signs: Do you ever get up in the middle of the night to have a pee?

Sounds familiar!

I’m guessing you’re a classic middle-aged dad. Do you go on and on about the heat being left on too long?

Well, have you seen the price of oil?

Are you watching documentaries on World War II?

They’re fascinating!

And mass murderers?

That would be ‘Britain’s Most Evil Killers’ with Fred Dinenage…great stuff! Well, you know what I mean…

Have trouble finding your keys?

Okay, I’ve accepted your argument! But we’re young at heart!

Get grumpy with other drivers?

Yeah, but have you seen some of the idiots out there!

Prefer Lyric FM to any of the other stations?

But it’s so…soothing!


(They pause to discuss Roscommon’s impressive win against Tyrone, before resuming…)


Not a fan of TikTok, I’m guessing?

I’m still trying to navigate Facebook!

You’re so behind the times! Facebook’s on the decline!

Oh dear! Just as I was about to start posting! I took a photo of my breakfast earlier!

You’re not the only one about to start posting! They’ve let Donald Trump back on Facebook…and Instagram!

Really? Maybe regular Trump posts will halt Facebook’s decline… ‘Go oldies’!


So there’s a reminder that great things can be achieved…even in old age!


Well, Trump is 76, and he’s planning to run for the White House again!

Have you forgotten the chaos he caused?

Now you’re suggesting that I’m getting forgetful!

Well, I did wonder when you bought that odd round in three last night!