Barstool Boyos – 26th June

At least the football’s back…

Yes! It’s good to see some Premier League action…and roll on the GAA!

Mind you, it is strange without any crowds…

I bet that’s what President Trump said!


When he got to Tulsa…for his big rally!


He was shocked by the small crowd!

Did he not just exaggerate…and boast that there was a huge crowd?

No, I think he was actually rattled this time. He was quite subdued looking…

Maybe he’s missing the GAA too!


(There’s a pause on the line)


Still, it’s great to have the soccer back…

Yes! Even if, as you say, it’s strange without the crowds…

The TV companies have been very creative, they’ve added on the recorded sound of fans, to create an atmosphere…

Yeah, but it’s not realistic.

Why do you say that?

There’s no expletives, no abuse!

I see some of the matches even have cardboard cut-outs of ‘fans’ in seats…extraordinary.

Yeah, and they’re social distancing.


Good question!

By the way, did you see Roy Keane’s rant?

Oh I’m sick of him! He’s just looking for attention!

Nah, he was right to call out Maguire and De Gea! Keane said he’d punch De Gea if he was in the dressing room with him!

Like I say, attention seeking!

And he wouldn’t let them back on the bus, after the mistakes they made, for the Spurs goal!

Keane’s a show-off, a loudmouth!

Would you say that to his face?

Well…eh…I’d email him, just to have it on the record!


(There’s a pause on the line)


Would he be any good as a GAA player?



Trump! Now HE’S some boyo!

Oh he would have been a marvellous GAA player. He has such confidence! And he’s so direct! And he loves solo runs!

Yeah, I can just imagine him complaining to the referee if a decision went against him!

Picking up the ball and storming off?

A course of action that was made for him!


(There’s a pause on the line)


You don’t mean what you said about Keane, do you?

Ah, he’s alright. Super player, can be entertaining as a pundit, but I just feel he’s overdoing the media stuff…becoming a caricature almost, sort of stuff he used to rail against!


By the way, I’ve a suggestion that might help Trump…

We don’t want to help Trump!

Yeah, but you know the way he’s obsessed with having big crowds…

And exaggerates their size?

Yeah…like at his inauguration…well, he could fill every stadium…all he has to do is use cardboard cut-outs!

Don’t rule it out!

Anyways, I’m going to wrap up on this chat. I want to make a cup of tea and read the Sunday papers.

Eh…maybe leave the Sunday Independent for a while…

Why? Who’s in it?


You can tell me, I can take it! Is it Marty Morrissey? Is it Miriam – again?

Nope, it’s a Barry Egan special…THREE PAGES!

Oh dear…not another interview with Twink? What D-lister has Barry metaphorically dragged out of some swanky nightclub…(metaphorically, ‘cos of Covid)?

Eh…he has an interview with Roy Keane.

Barry Egan? An interview…WITH KEANE?


I rest my case!