Sky’s the limit as Grand plan almost a faller!
Oh dear! SUCH a stressful weekend!
Is anything wrong? Did you have a mishap? How stressfu…
Very!
Go on…
Remote…
Ah yes, the old remote working…it’s very popular, I hear. Or is it stressful?
No, the remote control! The Sky remote!
The Sky remote?
Yes, the Sky remote! It drove me mad…
Don’t tell me you haven’t mastered the Sky remote…YET!
Well, I’m not normally good with technology…
I know! You’ve been upside down since the beginning of this WhatsApp call…
But…I HAD mastered the Sky remote…then I got cocky! Instead of just recording in the most basic way, I started searching for programmes a day or two in advance…and trying to programme recordings…
What happened?
Well, I was trying to record the Grand National on Saturday…
Yeah…
But it recorded Grand Designs!
Oh I love Grand Designs…that guy Kevin McCloud, he’s very…
It was a repeat, from 2004!
Oh dear!
I SO wanted to see the Grand National!
I know, I know. So, how did it go?
Don’t tell me you missed it too! Rachael, she delivered!
No, I mean how did Grand Designs go?
Forget about Grand Designs! If you must know, it was a cranky know-all with a very patient and glamorous wife, they had a two million pounds budget and were planning to build a house in a sea cave!
Wow!
Yeah, great! Then it got worse…
They went over budget? Too much glass?
No, forget about Grand Designs! It got worse with the Sky remote…I tried to programme the Masters on Sunday. I thought I had keyed in ‘Golf’…but it recorded ‘Gogglebox’!
(They pause to try and impersonate Kevin McCloud’s ‘quizzical look’ look…)
So anyways…
Actually, it was very good…
Yeah, well I realised my mistake, and I saw the last nine holes live…
No, I meant Gogglebox. It was a really funny episode. The two friends in the mobile home, they couldn’t stop laughing, and…
Forget Gogglebox! I saw the final holes of the Masters! Did YOU not watch it?
Of course I did, I recorded Gogglebox. Like you!
Aagh! Anyways, did you enjoy the Masters?
Yeah, it was grand…
Grand?
Yes, grand!
They’re gifted! They’re incredible! A great win for Matsuyama…
No argument from me on that…but Justin Thomas got an eight on a par five on Saturday…I’d have done better!
It’s Augusta! Have you any grasp of the pressure they’re under?
Well there was a young chap there, Will Zalatoris, he’s only 24, but he didn’t seem to be under any pressure at all…
That’s because they’re world class! That’s how good they are!
(They pause to stare longingly at images on Sky News of bars reopening in the UK)
Still, a good sporting weekend, even if I had my remote working – or remote not working (for me) – issues…
Yep, think I follow you. So was that the last of the mishaps?
Nah. I tried to record Tottenham v Manchester United…
But got Tommy Tiernan?
Yep.
Oh well. Anyways, I expect they got the job done?
Yeah, United won 3-1….
No, not United! The cranky know-all and his glamorous wife, did they get their dream house built in that sea cave?
