Flying pigs, cricket, and…Irish dancing
So, any word on our contract talks?
Huh?
Is the Editor going to renew our contract for this column?
Well…I’m actually STILL in talks with him…
Those talks are going on longer than…I dunno…the Northern Ireland protocol controversy!
The talks have been constructive, I’m confident there will be a breakthrough soon…
That’s exactly what the politicians say about the protocol talks!
Trust me…
They say that too! I presume there’s no more talk of the Editor drafting in Joe Brolly, even when we’re on holidays?
Eh…
You do realise that pigs will fly before I’ll allow Brolly to take my place?
Pigs will fly? Not very original!
Okay, so…King Charles will convert to Catholicism before…
That’s better!
….or cricket will be played in Hyde Park before I’ll allow Brolly to take my place…
Eh…
(They pause to check if Liz Truss is still in office; she is)
Hey, did you read about that dancing scandal?
Huh?
Absolutely scandalous! A joke!
Is Dancing with the Stars back? I had no idea! Is it Marty? Is he going for it again? Give him a break…
NO! The IRISH DANCING scandal!
Huh?
Apparently there’s been cheating going on!
Really?
Yes! Well, allegedly!
No way! Go on…
There are allegations of competition fixing…
Wow! Irish dancing just got interesting!
That’s a low blow…it’s always been interesting!
Only joking…
And this is no fun for competitors, or their parents…
Agreed!
Anyways, there’s only one winner in this scandal…
I assumed there’s been multiple winners, but some of them dubious?
No, just ONE winner on this one…
I don’t understand…
JOE DUFFY and Liveline!
(They pause to check online for the latest revelations concerning the Irish dancing scandal)
Now can you kindly put my mind at ease about our contract talks…as soon as possible!
Leave it with me!
This HAS to be a Brolly-free zone, I mean it!
Mmnn…
I’ll say it again, there will be cricket played in Hyde Park before I give way to him on this page!
Well…a lot depends on how it goes at The Lough/St Coman’s Park.
Huh?
Did you not see last week’s People? Cricket IS starting …at St Coman’s Park!
REALLY? I guess I’d better keep an eye out for flying pigs!
