Barstool Boyos – 10th of November

‘Desire’ for Bono’s book – and Musk-eteer comes out fighting

Hey, what do you think of that mega-rich egomaniac, you know…the guy that’s been in the news all week?

Who? Bono? I LOVE Bono! Can’t wait to get his book! I even tried two bookstores for it last week, but it wasn’t in stock. Still, gave me an opportunity to tell the friendly shop assistant ‘I still haven’t found what I’m looking for’.

Made their day, I’d say…you obviously really ‘Desire’ it.

What have you got against Bono?

I’m not talking about Bono! The super-wealthy guy, he’s all over Twitter, he’s ruthless and…

Trump? Is it Trump? Is he back on Twitter?

NO! Well, not yet! I’m talking about the guy who BOUGHT Twitter. He’s ALL OVER the company this week! What’s his name again?

Musk! Elon Musk! THAT’S the guy you’re on about! Yeah, he’s the richest person in the world! Made his cash through electric…

Gates…

No, not electric gates. Electric cars! Musk runs Tesla, the company that makes electric cars!

I didn’t mean electric gates, I was wondering about BILL Gates. I thought HE was the richest man in the world…

Oh you’re way out of touch! He was passed out a long time ago. He’s only worth 99bn US dollars!

What’s Musk worth?

200 billion US dollars!

Wow! And where is Gates going wrong?

Huh?

I mean, why is he stuck on 99bn, surely he can make it to 100?

Well, he’s trying, he’s trying!

 

(They pause to check for any updates on the ‘No Bounty Bars in Celebrations tubs’ controversy)

 

So, what do you think of him?

Bono?

No, Musk!

Well, am I right in saying he’s caused a bit of a rumpus since he took charge of Twitter this week?

A BIT OF A RUMPUS? He’s fired 3,700 staff worldwide, including some at Twitter’s European HQ…in Dublin.

Oh dear, that is quite shocking. It’s also a lot of face to face meetings, or maybe he did it all by Zoom…

On the contrary, Twitter employees received heartless emails, informing them they were being dismissed.

Oh dear, Elon’s suddenly my least favourite multibillionaire…

Yep, same here…anyways, it’s a mad world.

Agreed! Hey, I’ve to collect something in town. Do you fancy a pint?

Oh, I dunno, it’s quite early in the evening…

Maybe, but I have an excuse! I’m going back to that bookstore before it closes, the lady said she’d keep me a copy of Bono’s book.

Mmnn…I dunno about a pint this early…

Are you coming or not? It’s the 200 billion dollar question! Time is money! Make your mind up! I need Bono!

I can’t decide, I…

Well I’m going…with or without you!